Monday, March 30, 2009


eyes open, i drag myself to the shower.
keys, coffee...on to work.
the city is busy early this morning
and yet the commerce feels empty, hollow, not enough to keep my attention.
lacking confidence in my new tie, thoughts scramble yet they don't wander far.
the white noise of coworkers isn't enough either.

the view from the window of our floor, well the view.....
...its never looked this way before.

all these buildings, these marvels of architecture, they seemed in despair
i felt for the first time i noticed that they stood tall but they stood alone.
without a single email sent or memo read, it's lunchtime, and i have to get out.

elevator beeps, I'm almost there
fresh air will bring uniform to my thoughts
instead I'm distracted by the barren streets
its 12:42. there's usually not enough room to stand
and i feel as if this is the first time Ive ever seen the sidewalk.
decorated by old gum and a name scribbled when the cement was fresh.
further up i see a set of footprints.
wondering what business office they led to as i glanced down.
who could be in such a hurry they didn't notice stepping in recent construction?
inquisitive, naturally i have to follow them
it might seem cliche or just desperate for adventure
but these steps felt different than most
i don't even know how to explain but they had purpose.

striding down 7th street i take a look back and realize Ive walked 6 blocks already but more importantly the right footprint has started to change.
the left was a solid print but the right from the beginning was a sort of...limp?
intrigued. i continue to pursue even though I'm well past my portioned meal time. tell me more i think to myself as if the prints could answer back.
i continue my trek without hesitation. noticing some used bandages that were shed... i rush over.
they were dirty as expected but from stains of resentment and fear?

...what does that mean??

regardless my lack of understanding my pursuit continues.
I'm thrown by the image
what was on that compress that mended such a wound?
i ensue to see whats next.
something....there just has to be something soon
i just cant stop here
what is it?
cursing my legs inability to move faster
...a coat? a worn out coat?
what could this mean?
kneeling down, hesitant to touch it as if I'm afraid of its origin
its heavy.....inspecting it i feel the weight of others opinion
like an undertow it pulls
moreover than the depth of the tattered coat i wonder how the owner shed such a burden?
i sense a flicker
a glint of hope for myself.
my thoughts pause...
where are these indentions guiding me?

i loosen my "power" tie as it starts to choke
the afternoon sun cascades as the buildings shade from the skyline to the street.
i have to move
i have to know where this goes.
a debate has begun
a classic one at that
mind vs. soul
and the reigning champ in the corner preparing the usual justifying arguments.
i feel soul resilient
a fighting chance to...
don't get too excited just keep walking.
dusk is on me
i see a shape by the wayside.
its in pieces
but what is it?
kneeling i turn a bigger piece over
its a part of someones face...well correction, it was.
was this not their real face? its some sort of make shift mask...
pieces of it shattered others melted from the skin
and it made me wonder just where these footsteps had been.

right then i couldn't believe i had never realized
these footsteps are someones past,
and though i don't know who's they are
i see from where they've come.

sight, vision, some sense of clarity...I'm motionless.
tonight, under this sky i look up and even the air is dark.
understanding in a wave washes over me and the implications are sobering.
i reluctantly turn my head to look back...there they are.
my footprints.

just as i have followed and grown,
others will cross mine and know...

following your past made my future.....